On Mt. Kiluea with Ohi’a Lehua, Sacred Hawaiian Dragon tree of rebirth.

Reaching out for support is a powerful step. Finding a therapist you feel safe with is essential. My hope is that what you read here helps you sense whether we might be a good fit.

In terms of how I identify, I am first and foremost a mother, a daughter, a sister, and an auntie for blood and chosen family. I’m queer and neurodiverse. I live on Coastal Miwak land in Mill Valley, California with my children, my partner, and our cats. I feel deep gratitude for the land here and the ancestral and current communities that have tended to this place. My own ancestral roots trace back to the forests and fields of Eastern and Northern Europe.

My path to becoming a therapist has been shaped as much by lived experience as by formal training. Like many, I have moved through seasons of darkness and disorientation. Through contemplative practice, time in nature, and sustained inner work, I learned how to remain steady in the presence of intensity and extend compassion toward parts of myself I once struggled to accept. That journey deeply informs how I sit with clients today.

While my work is grounded in attachment science and nervous system awareness, it is also informed by a reverence for relationship — with ourselves, with one another, and with the living world. I support clients who are spiritually curious as well as those who simply want a grounded and steady space to make sense of their emotional lives.

I hold a B.S. in Mechanical Engineering from the University of Illinois and an M.A. in Counseling Psychology from the Institute of Transpersonal Psychology. My clinical training includes Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), Psychosynthesis, Hakomi, DBT-informed skills, sand play, and depth-oriented approaches that support emotional integration.

Clients often describe my presence as supportive, non-judgemental, warm, and grounded. I aim to offer a regulated and compassionate space where intensity can be held without overwhelm, and where humor and lightness can coexist with depth.

Hi, I’m Kate Merrill Evans

What it’s like to work with me?

Sessions with me are steady and engaged. I am active without being intrusive, warm without collapsing boundaries, and able to hold intensity without rushing to fix it. I pay close attention to the emotional patterns unfolding in the room and help slow them down so they can be understood rather than unconsciously repeated.

Clients often describe feeling both deeply supported and thoughtfully challenged. Our work can hold a wide emotional range — it’s not unusual for tears and laughter to share the same space.

My work integrates Emotionally Focused Therapy, parts work, and nervous system attunement. I focus on helping clients understand how attachment history and protective patterns shape present-day reactions. As self-judgment softens and steadiness grows, more intentional and constructive connection becomes possible.

My approach

On difference, power & liberation

As a white, neurodiverse, and queer therapist, I hold deep awareness of how identity and systems of power shape our lived experience — including my own. It is an ongoing responsibility of mine to examine how privilege, whiteness, and inherited narratives influence the lens I bring into the room.

I approach this work with humility and reverence. I welcome conversations about difference, power, and the dynamic between us. I can be with the pain that arises from systemic harm — and I also hold deep respect for the resilience, creativity, and wisdom that emerge through struggle.

At the same time, it may not feel right to work with a therapist who does not share important aspects of your identity. That is completely valid. My priority is that you find a therapeutic environment that truly supports your healing and growth. If I am not the right fit, I am committed to helping you find someone who is.

I hold close these words by Lilla Watson:
“If you have come here to help me you are wasting your time, but if you have come because your liberation is bound up with mine, then let us work together.”